Should I get an abortion?

First off I would like to state that in no way would I have ever aborted my child because of a defect. I do not believe that it is something that you should do unless there are very extreme circumstances. I was asked to do this post by some people. So if someone is wondering what they should do with their baby that was just diagnosed with Spina Bifida they maybe could get some help from this post. The reality in this world is that people do think that this is something that just needs to be done. When they find out that their child has Spina Bifida, Down Syndrome, or any other kind of birth defect that could make their life and the child's life harder they choose to abort. 9 in 10 babies are aborted that have Spina Bifida So why not us? Why didn't we decide to?

He is my child. That is my little boy in there. The love that I had the moment that I knew there was another little human in there has accompanied me to this day. I have two special little girls in my life and so I didn't mind if I had another girl, or if I had a boy it didn't matter to me. Was it hard when I found out that he had Spina Bifida? OF COURSE! It may have been one of the hardest moments of our life. I look at him now and he looks like me. How could I give that up? 

What about him? He is going to have a rougher life because he has Spina Bifida. Yes he is. But why can't I as a parent teach him to overcome those challenges that he may face in life? Isn't that my job as a father to help my children through the troubling times in their life? This is no different. We as parents have to help our children to be the best that they can be. Everyone is different and has different talents. He may not be Derek Jeter because he may have some physical challenges. But that doesn't mean he can't be an astronaut, a physicist, or a musician. I was born blind in my left eye and it affects me at times. The doctors told my parents that I would probably always walk weird, never be able to play sports, and probably have some different challenges in my life. I walk just fine, I may not be the greatest athlete but I played different sports all the way up until high school. I had challenges sure, but I overcame them.

Another reason is I am adopted. I could have easily been aborted and my mother chose a different option. I am extremely grateful for that. I have a beautiful family now and could not imagine not having them. I am eternally grateful that this did not happen to me. There is always the adoption route. Even if you may not think someone out there would want this baby you are going to have. I promise you there is someone out there to love that little guy or girl. 

And since I am sure at some point someone reading this is going to be a woman and maybe wants that perspective I am going to let my wife write a paragraph or so on why she didn't want to abort our little boy. 

ANN: Obviously my husband and I are pro-life we were both raised and believe that abortion is wrong but I know that there are many reasons people choose to have abortions and that it is a big decision so if you are considering to abort a pregnancy make sure you have consulted with people that can help you make this decision because it is a very personal decision and it is something that will affect you for the rest of your life.  

When we first found out that our baby had spina bifida it was a lot to take in what is spina bifida? And how is it going to affect me. Some of my first thoughts were selfish thoughts, what is my life going to consist of, taking care of a special needs child? Would I be able to still do things that I wanted to do? Next came my families needs, would I be able to be a good mom to my other kids and still be able to take care of a special needs baby? How would it affect my other kids? Would they feel neglect or anger towards us as parents or toward their new sibling?

There was a lot of overwhelming information about spina bifida, yes it was going to change our lives it already had but that was my baby, it didnt matter to me what sex he was, or what he looked like so why should it matter what his body was capable of doing or not doing. I know that some days are going to be challenging for my entire family because of his needs but I also know how much I love him and I was in love with him the moment I found out he was in there. That is why for me I would have never chose to abort.